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Pastor's Corner

Loving the Unlovable

Minister Kevin Hooper
April 30, 2025

Jesus says some very hard things to swallow. Let’s take His command to love our enemies, for example (Matt. 5:44). How do we love someone that is disagreeable, unloving, or even hateful to us?

One thing to consider is what Jesus actually commanded. He didn’t say “LIKE your enemies”; He said LOVE them! We tend to think of the word “love” as an emotional, heart-felt thing. How can I feel that way about someone who seems to hate me? I can’t. But love in the Bible really has nothing to do with how we feel. In the original Greek language that our New Testament was written in, there are several words for love: “eros” = romantic love, usually based on emotions, “phileo” = companionable or brotherly love, “storge” = familial love and “agape” = unconditional, loyal, faithful love.

When Jesus commands us to love our enemies, He isn’t using “phileo” or “storge” or even the emotional “eros”; He says “agape your enemies”. That kind of love has nothing to do with how we feel. It is unconditional and loyal. It is God’s kind of love. It’s the kind of love that we experienced when God showed His love for us in Christ dying for us while we were enemies and sinners (Romans 5:8-10). We weren’t acting loving toward Jesus when He died for us; in fact, humanity killed Him while He was showing His greatest act of love.

We should consider four things as we decide to love those we consider unlovable. First, remember that your “enemy” is a sinner just like you (Romans 3:23). Having a hard time caring for a person that has said horrible things to you? You’ve done the same to others as well. Realizing we’ve all broken God’s Law humbles us and puts us on the same level with our enemies.

Second, she was created in God’s image just like you were (Genesis 1:27). That person was lovingly created by a God that gave attention to the smallest detail while knitting that life together in her mother’s womb (Psalm 139:13-15). Should we hate someone that bears God’s image? Jesus equated Himself with those who needed love, saying that when we feed, clothe and care for those in need, we’re doing the same to Jesus. Likewise, when we ignore those who need to be loved, we’re ignoring Jesus (Matthew 25:34-46).

Third, pray for those you struggle to love. Consider the fact that Jesus coupled love with prayer for enemies. It is difficult to hate someone you pray for daily and likewise, it is easier to love someone you’ve been praying for. Prayer for someone urges us to consider their plight and to be sympathetic, even empathetic to them.

Finally, remember that our motivation to love others is not so that we will be loved by God. Instead, we love others because He loved us first (1 John 4:9-10). We love out of a response to God’s love, not because we think we can earn His love. We love because God is love!

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